No Regrets Read online

  Contents

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Chapter Ten

  Chapter Eleven

  Chapter Twelve

  Chapter Thirteen

  Chapter Fourteen

  Chapter Fifteen

  Chapter Sixteen

  Chapter Seventeen

  Chapter Eighteen

  Chapter Nineteen

  Chapter Twenty

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Chapter Twenty-Seven

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  Chapter Thirty

  Chapter Thirty-One

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  Chapter Thirty-Four

  Chapter Thirty-Five

  Chapter Thirty-Six

  No Regrets

  B.B. Donnelly

  COPYRIGHT

  No Regrets Copyright @ 2019 by B.B. Donnelly

  All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law.

  This is a work of fiction. Any names, places, or characters are the product of the author’s imagination. If there are any resemblances to actual people, places, organizations, or events, it is purely coincidental.

  Cover Design by Eight Base Book Design

  “Loyalty is the backbone of every relationship.

  When that loyalty is gone, the betrayal is devastating.”

  Chapter One

  “You’re getting weak on me, Sparkler!” Jackson taunts, throwing a punch, which I effectively block.

  “Ha, ha, I don’t think so, Cowboy.” I throw a front kick to his precious jewels. He blocks it. Our abilities are equal in many ways. I may be short and slight, but I’m quick. He is tall and lean, with a cougar’s grace. We have been training together since I was ten years old and he was thirteen. Back then, Jackson would beat me every time, but as the years went by, my determination to win my father’s approval made me a force to be reckoned with.

  I land a blow to his jaw. Jackson takes his wrapped hand, wiping a thumb across the bottom of his lip. We break apart from each other. I’m jumping from foot to foot, wearing a cocky grin. I see Jackson’s eyes roam over my body for the thirtieth time today. I know my body looks tanned and toned in all the right places. I’m feeling warm all over from his hot gaze. My grin gets bigger. I stop and tighten up my long blond ponytail.

  “Like what you see?” I tease boldly. His face is priceless. I have never gone into that territory with him. I have avoided it, afraid of rejection, but I can’t stop it. It has gradually happened over the years. I have fallen completely head over heels in love with Jackson Chase Ross. I mean how could I not? I have memorized every feature on his face.

  Jackson is gorgeous with tanned skin, dark brown hair that he wears long on top, and his eyes, oh my god, his eyes are the clearest blue. They are almost crystal clear blue or ice blue if you piss him off, which I tend to do often. At twenty-two, he has built his body into a lean, body of muscle, chiseled in just the right places. He is every girl’s idea of a dark and dangerous bad boy. He is standing right in front of me and kicking at my head….

  “Ow! Shit, that hurt!” I rub my temple. It was just a glancing blow, but it did get my attention.

  “Watch your mouth.” He lectures. I give him a disbelieving look.

  “Okay, Dad.” I say sarcastically.

  “Well, that’s what happens when you get too cocky.” He says, flashing his sexy grin.

  “I am not cocky; I was just distracted….” I stop. He looks at me curiously, trying to figure out what I could be distracted by and I see when it dawns on him.

  I ignore his arrogant smile and run at him, launching myself in a surprise attack followed with multiple punches and cheap shots. He blocks every single one and smirks the whole time. He throws me away from him and I land gracefully in a squat position. He is full out laughing, but now I’m anything but distracted. I’m ready to take that sexy smirk off his face. He runs a hand through his hair. While he is, I make my next move which is my specialty, a round house kick. The kick is done with perfection except that he stops it, holding onto my leg. He pulls me in and flips me to the ground. Whoof!

  I’m lying there like a fish out of water, gasping for breath. Before I know it, the follow through comes in the shape of Jackson’s full weight on top of me, holding my arms over my head. My legs are pinned to the ground by his.

  “Whatcha going to do now, Sparkler?” His voice is husky, sending shots of heat to all the places we are touching. I start squirming and then bucking my hips trying to knock him off. I hear his intake of breath; my eyes fly to his bright baby blues. I am completely aware of his reaction to me. I’m only wearing a sports bra and black booty shorts. It is a little less then what I normally wear, but I wanted to get his attention. This is something I have wanted forever. I just wanted verification that Jackson sees me more than that annoying little girl that used to follow him around. And the evidence is in his pants, and he can’t hide it because I can feel it. Yay me!

  I watch intently as he licks his lips staring at mine. Here it is, finally. He’s going to do it. I lick mine in anticipation and he follows the movement. He settles himself more firmly between my legs. I gasp at the sensation. I have the strong desire to move against him, but I’m afraid I’ll ruin this perfect moment. Our breathing becomes a little more ragged. He starts to lean down, and we are so close that our breaths mingle…

  “There you guys are! Did he take you down again, Carter?” My father’s boisterous voice can catch the attention of a deaf man. I groan in frustration. I see the disappointment flash in Jackson’s eyes as he quickly gets off me, offering me a hand. I accept it, gracefully, like we are getting ready to waltz instead of kicking each other’s asses. He pulls me to my feet, and I notice Jackson quickly turning to the table. He grabs a water and a towel. I turn to my father.

  “He got a lucky shot.” I tell my father. Chief Advisor Brenton Drazen, my father, gives me a look of disapproval.

  “There is no such thing as a lucky shot. There is good and there is better. You cannot afford to get distracted. It could cost you your life.” He lectures. I refrain from rolling my eyes because one thing is for sure, my father could hand me my ass at any time. He is that good. So instead, I glance over at Jackson. I suppress a giggle as I notice that he still hasn’t turned back to face us. Someone must be having some problems getting his, um, parts under control. I turn back to my father.

  “I will be ready when the time comes. I will not get distracted.” My father’s brown eyes look at me thoughtfully.

  “Alright, then, I need you tonight.” My father says with authority. I think I need my ears checked. Did he just say he needs me for a mission? Hell yeah! Jackson suddenly turns around, walking towards us.

  “Sir, I don’t think that is a good idea. I heard this man is brutal to women.” Jackson protests forcefully. I plead with my father with my eyes. My father’s eyes never waver from mine and I can tell he is contemplating.

  “I disagree. I think it is a great idea and she is the perfect person for the job. The subject likes
his women blond and well, look at her. She is of age now and the subject will like her spunk.”

  “But, sir, she is your daughter.” I hear Jackson’s disapproval.

  “Yes, I’m aware of that. She is also an agent for this organization. She has decided to serve this country. She is well trained and is highly qualified in the fine arts. She is going to be great, plus you’ll be there to watch over her.” My father explains. I glare at Jackson.

  Please don’t ruin this for me I plead with my eyes. I know it is sad to need your father’s approval so bad.

  I can tell Jackson is not happy, but his face softens towards me.

  “I’m sorry, sir, you are absolutely right. Carter will do an excellent job, I’m sure. I was just worried that she would be recognized as your daughter and be used to get back at you.” I give out a sigh of relief. My father clasps Jackson’s shoulder.

  “Well, that is only if she gets caught, which she won’t,” my father says with confidence and I’m thrilled by his faith in me, but then he continues, “She knows the consequences of failing a mission.” He dismisses me, with a stern look making me feel like a little kid being told to behave.

  “And how many times do I have to ask you, son, call me Brenton.” My father gazes upon Jackson with pride. I feel the twinge of jealousy. My father has never looked at me like that. Jackson is the son my father never had. Jackson’s father died when he was thirteen. His father was an agent for my father. My father may be an advisor to the President, but that is only part of his job. He is actually the head of a secret organization within the United States government. My father knows the ins and outs of the White House. Our mission is to take out any threat to the country. If it means political assassinations, spying, gathering intelligence, you name it, we do it. It may seem wrong to most people, but for those that put in the strenuous hours of training, it is our life. It is our life mission to protect and serve this nation.

  With my father being the head of the organization, he always wanted a son, but instead he got me. Carter Taylor Drazen. Obviously, I have what could be two boy names. Apparently, my mother wanted to call me Cartier. I don’t know what would have been worse. Anyhow, my father got a son in Jackson.

  Jackson’s father was killed during an important mission. I don’t know the details, but Jackson didn’t take it well. My father took him under his wing. Since then, he has treated Jackson like his son. I don’t blame Jackson for any of it. In fact, I admire him. Jackson has worked so hard to be the best and I know it is to make his father proud. His father was extremely loyal to the organization and stressed to Jackson the importance of loyalty.

  Looking over at the two, I realize my father and Jackson have lost interest in me. They have their heads together, discussing the mission. I wander away, pulling a swig from my water bottle. I pick up the latest gossip magazine and roll my eyes in disgust when I see Brooklyn and Jackson on the cover. My second life is that of a spoiled socialite. I run in high society’s circles, dress in designer clothes, pampered and spoiled by my rich parents. My arch nemesis is Brooklyn Sutherland, the typical mean girl. Brooklyn has beautiful dark red hair that hangs in perfect waves down her back. Her skin looks like porcelain, olive toned and perfect. She is tall with a dancer’s body and I don’t mean an exotic dancer, but a classical dancer. Jackson and her look like the perfect couple, tall, dark, and gorgeous. Yuck!

  My body, on the other hand, is more like an exotic dancer. I look good, but I’m only 5’4” and curvy in all the right places. I always wanted to be tall and waiflike, but everyone wants what they can’t have. I hate that I’m so jealous of her, but she has the one thing that money can’t buy me. Jackson. Although from what I understand, it is only a cover, a job, or mission. Get close to the daughter, close to the family, and bam, you are close to your target. Brooklyn’s father is a very wealthy man. He is in the “waste management” business. Supposedly, he is the head honcho for the mafia in the Washington area. He has been pretty peaceful lately, but it has been rumored that he has been involved in corrupting a few politicians recently. When I see Brooklyn in a new designer outfit every day, you know Daddy is making some good money. I was originally supposed to get close to Brooklyn and be friends with her, but she immediately saw me as a threat and since then we can’t stand each other. Sooooo Jackson was put in my place. He is the love interest. Ugh, I want to vomit at the thought. I’m just glad it is only a cover; at least I hope it is. That would suck if he does have feelings for her. I’m interrupted out of my musings by my father’s loud voice.

  “Carter, go to your mother. She has a dressed picked out for tonight. I’m sure it will be perfect. Then I want you to meet with Lana to go over the details of the mission.” He pauses and walks over to me. He pulls me into a hug. My eyes go wide in surprise. I look over his shoulder and see Jackson just shrug his shoulders. What’s gotten into my father? He doesn’t ever show me affection. He pats my back and squeezes tight.

  “You be careful tonight. I am counting on you.” He releases me and turns towards Jackson, pointing a finger at him.

  “You take care of her. Watch and make sure nothing more happens then what is necessary.” On that cryptic note, he strolls from the room in powerful strides. My father is such a dominating personality.

  “Jackson, what exactly am I dealing with tonight?” I ask. He walks over to me and pulls my arm, pulling me toward him like he is going to tell me a secret.

  In hushed tones, “it will be a kill mission. Your job is to distract the target and get him alone with you. He likes girls that look like you. We need you to really distract him.”

  “Wait, am I supposed to have sex with him!?” I ask, shocked. I mean I have heard of some undercover agents having to go that far, but I just wasn’t quite ready for that yet or even ever. Since I’ve never had sex before, I don’t want my first time to be on a mission with someone I don’t even like or know for that matter. I was hoping to lose it to the guy looking at me. I just haven’t let him know that little detail.

  He pulls me in close, resting his forehead on mine. My heart beats a little faster.

  “No, no. Just do your best to keep him distracted before getting to that point.” He says in a rough whisper.

  “Do I have to kill him?” I ask, whispering back, loving how close our faces are.

  “No, that is my job.” I can hear the dread in his voice. I know he hates kill missions. This will be my first kill mission, but I can see how it changes a person. I know I shouldn’t, but I use the situation to my advantage and seeing that we are alone, this is the perfect opportunity.

  “Jackson,” I whisper his name softly, “will you kiss me.” I hear the intake of his breath. I have shocked him by the look in his eyes. Soon the shock is replaced by something more. He brings his face closer to mine.

  “I shouldn’t, Carter.” He replies, deflating my heart. Then suddenly, his lips are on mine. It is a gentle caress against my lips, soft and loving. I start to pull him in tighter, but he quickly moves back from me, releasing his hold on me. I’m a little disappointed in the lack of passion, but it is still sweet, and I can tell he was restraining himself. Unfortunately, it also felt like a pity kiss.

  “I’m sorry, Carter, I really…. I just can’t.” He says with regret in his eyes.

  “It’s okay. I understand.” I reply, not understanding at all. I thought he wanted me. Before he can reply, I grab my bag and start for the doors.

  “Carter.” He says my name, but I don’t turn back, afraid he will see the tears in my eyes. I give him a quick wave.

  “See you later, Cowboy.” I say, trying not to choke on the words. I have a new determination for this mission. I will make him see that I’m a desirable woman and an equal. I will make him want me as much as I want him and make my father proud tonight. All in a day’s work.

  Chapter Two

  Finally, it is time. The anticipation is rolling over me like a cold breeze. After a lot of primping, pampering, and analyzing every aspect o
f this mission, I have arrived. The sprawling mansion is lit up bright with sparkling gowns, chandeliers, and diamonds draped off the necks of beautiful women. As planned, Jackson and I would arrive separately. I felt safe knowing he was already here somewhere. I wish I could see his reaction to my dress first hand, but I’m not supposed to know him tonight. The dress is a gorgeous number, a black, strapless, seductive number. It shows off my curves to perfection. My long straight blond hair is in a low ponytail with a diamond clasp. My neck is covered with a splay of diamonds, courtesy of the United States government. I’m feeling confident that I look good enough to attract my target’s attention.

  Now, if I could only get confident about the actual details of my assignment. I reflect over the mission once again and I shudder. The thought of someone I don’t know pawing at me is not appealing. I saw the picture of my target and yes, while he is good looking, he is a very dangerous man. Nicholas Senzski is a powerful man at the age of thirty-five. He is involved in trafficking, drugs, weapons, and women. There is more to the story, but I’m not privy to that information, but it must be bad for a kill mission. I was prepped for this with only the need to know. I was to appear flighty, a tease, a spoiled princess rebelling against her rich daddy. I can handle that. When approached by the target, I was to be direct, sassy, and in charge. He likes women like that just so he can dominate them in the bedroom. He enjoys bringing strong women into submission and the part that sickens me, he likes to destroy them physically and mentally. Not very many women have survived in the care of his hands. Of course, he has never met someone like me.

  I sneak past the security guards with a flirty smile and grab a flute of champagne off a passing tray. I find a spot along the wall and lean against it, getting my bearings straight. I slowly scan my surroundings, looking for my target. Even though, I want to get in and out of the party, I can’t be too eager or pushy. I spot my target and as predicted he is surrounded by beautiful women. How the hell am I supposed to grab his attention? Well, one thing for sure, I never will if I stand around like a wallflower. I push off the wall with a deep breath and make my way towards the target. I walk with confidence and I notice his eyes are on me. He is a very handsome man and his hooded gaze is watching me. I boldly look back at him and give him my most haughty spoiled princess look. I look at