Lucky Me Read online

  Contents

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Chapter Ten

  Chapter Eleven

  Chapter Twelve

  Chapter Thirteen

  Chapter Fourteen

  Chapter Fifteen

  Chapter Sixteen

  Chapter Seventeen

  Chapter Eighteen

  Chapter Nineteen

  Chapter Twenty

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  LUCKY

  ME

  BY

  B.B. DONNELLY

  COPYRIGHT

  LUCKY ME Copyright @ 2020 by B.B. Donnelly

  All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the publisher, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law.

  This is a work of fiction. Any names, places, or characters are the product of the author’s imagination. If there are any resemblances to actual people, places, organizations, or events, it is purely coincidental.

  Cover Design by Designs by James

  ISBN: 9798645372774

  I have loved him from the very first time I saw him. He was already shining bright in my eyes and now the world sees him as I did. Once upon a time, he was my whole world. Now we are strangers. They left me behind, and he shattered my heart….

  Have you ever thought the world was against you? That you are one of the unluckiest people alive? Have you ever questioned why it seems no one cares about you?

  Charleigh Matthias lives in a world of privilege, but nothing in her life is what it seems. She has been betrayed by those closest to her and taken advantage of by those that she is left behind with. Her hopes and dreams of becoming a songwriter and singer seem so lost to her. Will she find the courage to fight for what she wants or continue down a spiral of despair?

  Asher Stewart, the one that got away, has come back into her life with so much hate in his heart for her. But her love for him has never died. He can barely tolerate her, but it seems there are moments when she glimpses the old Asher.

  Will her love for him survive through his torment? How can she fight for him when she has to fight for herself? Will her life always be a series of opportunities she lets pass by or will her luck change?

  Life is about choices, some bad, some good, and some are just the luck of the draw…

  Chapter One

  I have loved him from the very first time I saw him. He was already shining bright in my eyes and now the world sees him as I did. Once upon a time, he was my whole world. Now we are strangers. They left me behind, and he shattered my heart….

  “Pass it if you’re not gonna hit it.”

  My life in a nutshell. A series of opportunities that I let pass. How did I get here? It’s all his fault.

  Honestly, it’s not, but I’m going to blame him anyway. In fact, how I got here is a sequence of people and events. They abandoned me to this life. They are the reason. I keep telling myself that and I wish deep down I could blame everyone else.

  But the sad truth is… it is my fault. All my fault.

  “Hey, did you hear me, you dumb bitch?”

  I snap out of my thoughts and quickly pass the joint. I duck my head. A few years ago, no one would have been able to call me that without repercussions. Those days are long gone.

  “Dude, your girl is hot, but she isn’t all there in the head.” Chris says to my boyfriend Blake.

  Chris is the biggest asshole around, but he has the best drugs. Lucky for me, he is my boyfriend’s best friend and we get to spend all our free time with him. I’m not into drugs like they are, yes, I occasionally take a hit, but not like them.

  Every day I sit on this nasty couch, watching everyone get high around me. I usually stay until they pass out, and then I escape. But not before my boyfriend has his way with me on Chris’s bed that smells like cigarettes, beer, and body odor. Lucky me….

  “Yeah, just how I like em’” Blake says, taking another hit. He starts rubbing my shoulder and then gives it a hard squeeze.

  “I think I’m going to have a go with her.” Chris states and my stomach drops.

  He has made insinuations before, but Blake has always laughed them off. This time there is a seriousness in his voice. Blake just shrugs and waves a hand to the bedroom.

  “Go for it. She has been a dead fuck for a while now.” My heart breaks a little.

  I know we are not like we used to be. It used to be so fun and exciting and now, we are different. This life isn’t what I wanted. But to have him hand me off like a piece of property… I can’t do it anymore.

  Maybe it’s the fact that they are coming back that is giving me the courage to do what I should have done a long time ago. I stand up.

  “I have to go.” I say, heading towards the door.

  “Hey, I promise to make you feel good.” Chris says, grabbing his crotch. I look away in disgust.

  “Let her go. Get some bitches over here that know how to give a guy head.” Blake says.

  In that moment, I know it is over. Blake could care less about me. He is so gone and if I stay, he will take me down with him. I deserve better. I have always deserved better.

  How did I ever get myself here?

  I reach the door and turn one last time.

  “Blake, it’s over. Do not contact me. Thanks for the fun.” I roll my eyes and shut the door behind me, muffling his response.

  I feel a weight lift off my shoulders. I should have gotten rid of that toxic asshole a long time ago.

  I jump into my truck and drive away from them. As I drive on the winding roads, passing the beautiful landscapes of Tennessee, I take a deep breath. The wind blows through my hair from the open window. For the first time in a long time, I feel like I can breathe.

  Why did it take me so long to leave him?

  The fact is… I’m not even heartbroken. He was fun and a distraction for a short period of time, but I know he isn’t the one that I want. The one I long for left me and betrayed me. His leaving hurt so badly I never thought I would recover. In fact, I don’t think I did recover. A pang slices through my heart every time I think about him.

  I wish I could forget him, but his face is plastered everywhere, on magazines, on billboards, on social media, television….everywhere!

  I pull into the gated community where huge homes with spacious yards grace both sides of the road. I barely give them a glance. I pull up to my house and park my truck in the front instead of the back. My mother would love for me to hide my truck because it looks so cheap. My truck means everything to me, more than her opinion.

  I open the front door and walk through the elegant foyer of our home. The ceilings are high and two beautiful staircases line the walls on each side. I take the steps two at a time and pray that my mom doesn’t hear me.

  I pull open the door to my bedroom and fall to my bed. I reach under my pillow and grab my songbook. I flip open the book and stare at the pages. They taunt me. I stare at my lyrics. I flip to the beginning. My heart aches when I read the words written there. This book contains my memories, my heartbreak…my soul.

  I swipe the tear that has fallen to my cheek. It’s no use remembering. I don’t even have to read these lyrics. I just have to turn on the radio and
I will hear them. My songs, my words, my soul, but no one will ever know.

  The most heartbreaking is the words that had faded away on the last pages. I have not written a single song, a single lyric since they left me behind. They forgot me and I try every day to forget him. I used Blake to try to forget him. I used drugs to try to forget him, but he is branded on my soul and I will never forget his last words….

  I could never love you. You are just like your mother, a scheming, lying bitch. I wish I had never met you. I can’t wait to leave so I never have to see your face again.

  I shake away those fateful painful words. Those words held so much power. They were the cause of my downfall. I have to move on, but how can I when he is coming back?

  I slam the book shut and shove it back under my pillow. That book was everything to me and now it’s just a book full of wishful thinking.

  “CHARLEIGH!!”

  Shit. My mom is home. I hope Asshole Number 11 isn’t with her. My mother has been married multiple times and even more dumbass boyfriends have been in between the marriages and after. This one is a real winner… NOT.

  “CHARLEIGH!!”

  I wonder if I ignore her like she normally does me, she’ll go away. I can hear her stomping up the stairs. I roll over on my back and groan in frustration. Here we go….

  She slams open my door and I close my eyes.

  “CHARLEIGH! I have been yelling at you forever! What the hell?” I hear her come closer to my bed.

  “What do you want?” I ask, with my eyes still closed.

  “A little respect.” She states.

  She throws something on my bed. I open my eyes and sit up to face her. The sooner I find out what she wants, the sooner she will leave. I pick up the bag. It’s from an expensive boutique.

  “What’s this?” I ask, eyeing it with suspicion.

  “A little something, I picked up for you!” She says with a girlish giggle.

  My mother has been going through a mid-life crisis for most of my life. She dresses like a teenager. She looks amazing, but there is only so long you can defy nature. She flips her dyed red hair with her perfectly manicured hand. I roll my eyes.

  “Thanks.” I say dryly.

  She frowns and then stops, realizing it causes wrinkles. She flattens her face which is probably hard to do with all the Botox injected in there.

  “Really, Charleigh, I don’t know what is going on with you!” She says with disgust.

  I stare at her in silence. I bite back the angry words. She won’t understand. She will never try to understand.

  “At least, look at it.” She gestures towards the bag.

  I sigh and grab the bag. I jerk it open and pull out a beautiful pink top. It’s something I would have worn two years ago, but it’s not my style anymore.

  “Well?”

  “Thanks.” I throw the top back into the bag and flop back onto my bed.

  “Oh my god, you are so frustrating!” She exclaims. I close my eyes to the rant I’m about to hear.

  “You are the most ungrateful brat!” She goes on and on, but I tune her out. The thoughts in my head are wanting to be heard, but I know she will never listen.

  Mom, why don’t you love me more than the men in your life? Why don’t you ever put me first? Why don’t you ever listen to what is wrong in my life? Why do I have to take care of you after every heartbreak? When have you ever taken the time to listen to me? Why do you never ask me about my life or my dreams? Why are you so self-centered?

  Why won’t you listen when I say your boyfriends like me more than you? Why won’t you believe me when I say it makes me uncomfortable? Why do you blame me for your life problems? The questions go on and on….

  “Michael is coming home tomorrow and I expect you to act somewhat normal!” She says before slamming the door behind her.

  I roll over and shove my face in my pillow to muffle the scream. Most people probably think that I have it all. I live in a huge house, designer clothes are hanging in my closet, I could drive an expensive car, but I’m missing what everyone else takes for granted…. someone to love them.

  My phone pings with a text message. I swear if it’s from Blake….

  I glance at it and my stomach drops. It’s from Michael.

  Can’t wait to see you! - Michael

  I don’t answer. I just can’t. Most people would be thrilled to see their cousin and part of me is. He is my best friend, but he is bringing my past with him. I’m not the same person I was before.

  I put my phone in my back pocket and leave my room. I take the back staircase that leads to the back yard. It’s best I avoid my mother tonight. She is probably well into her second glass of wine and who knows when Tim, her boyfriend, will arrive.

  I walk across the manicured lawn and into the wooded area. I take the path that is starting to look overgrown. When I reach the small clearing, I look up into the trees. There is the treehouse that was and has been my salvation.

  When I was younger, my cousin and I would hide here when my mom’s boyfriends would come over. So much laughter and fun was found in these four walls. Just like the days gone by, the treehouse has changed. It no longer hears the laughter, hopes and dreams of children.

  I climb the rickety ladder and enter my safe haven. The treehouse is small, but I have supplies up here. I’ve patched up the roof and put blankets on the floor. There are candles, bottle water, snacks, weed, paraphernalia, and alcohol. Definitely not a child’s place any longer.

  I lay back on the blankets. So, Blake and I are over. Michael is coming home. He is coming home….

  I light up a joint and inhale. I need to chill out. I cough a little. I need to stop this shit. My mind and body start to relax as the sun sets. The wind makes its own music through the trees.

  God, I wish I could write. It would help me so much. It was my therapy. I needed to make music; it was my identity. When they left, the betrayal was so deep, that my music, my life was ripped from me.

  I take another drag. Screw this, screw them. I blow out the smoke, watching it waft through the air. My life is so screwed up.

  My phone pings again. I glance at it. This time it’s from Chris. I click on it and wait for the photo to download. I prepare myself, but nothing can change what I’m going to see.

  There is a blond girl on her knees in front of Blake. It’s very obvious what she is doing and looking at Blake’s face, he is wholeheartedly enjoying it.

  I text Chris back to delete my number and never contact me again. He responds with a laughing emoji.

  I put everything away in the tree house and climb down. I’m too restless. I know it’s because I will see him tomorrow.

  I walk back towards my house and glance at the house next door. I look up at the window that is right across from my bedroom. It’s dark, but I know tomorrow there will be a light on. My stomach hurts more from that thought then knowing that my boyfriend replaced me so quickly.

  I slam open the back door into the kitchen, startling my mom and Tim.

  “Where have you been?” My mom asks. Tim checks me out. I roll my eyes at them.

  “Around.” I state. I grab an apple from the fruit bowl.

  “I can make you something to eat.” I pause right before I eat the apple.

  “When did you start cooking?” I ask. Tim laughs, but my mom gives me an annoyed look.

  “Oh honey, you know I can cook! We just haven’t had time lately.”

  “I’m good, thanks.” I say and grab a water from the refrigerator.

  “Why don’t you join us tonight?” Tim asks. It seems innocent enough, but the look in his eyes is anything but.

  “No thanks.” I say.

  I watch as he pours my mother another glass of wine. Definitely, going to be locking my door tonight. He likes to get her drunk and waits for her to pass out, before looking for me.

  “Charleigh, I would really like for you to spend more time with us.” He says.

  There is a gleam in his eyes that
makes me think of a calculating snake. One blessing of Michael coming home is maybe he will lay off of me.

  “That’s a great idea!” My mom says with enthusiasm.

  “I have plans.” I say, but my mom won’t lay off.

  “What else could you possibly be doing?” My mom asks.

  “Oh, come on, look at her, she is so young and beautiful. I’m sure she has many dates lined up.” Tim says. My mom looks at me with jealousy. Oh no…

  “Charleigh, why don’t you go ahead with your plans.” My mom says, with a warning.

  She makes her way over to Tim, staking her claim. They start making out, but Tim’s eyes never leave me. I look at him in disgust and leave the room as quickly as I can. I glance back and see he is smirking at me with his hands on my mom’s ass.

  “Thanks a lot, Tiny Tim.” I mutter under my breath.

  I run up to my room and lock the door behind me. It’s a Saturday night and I’m alone. I’m freaking pathetic. I pull my desk chair up against my door, shoving it under the doorknob.

  I should have grabbed more than an apple, but there is no way in hell I’m leaving my room now. I hear music playing from the kitchen and of course, it is one of their songs. Oh wait, I mean one of my songs. I put my own earbuds in, trying to drown out the noise.

  My phone pings again. I reach for it on my bed and see I have multiple messages. Some are from Blake, most are from Chris with pictures attached, a few from Michael and one from an unknown number.

  I delete the ones from Blake and Chris. The one’s from Michael are asking me if I’m okay. I don’t know how to answer, so I don’t. I open the one from the unknown number.

  Answer your cousin. He is worried. I personally don’t give a shit what you are doing, but I’m tired of listening to him. - Unknown

  My heart drops from my chest. It’s him. It’s Asher Stewart.

  I throw the phone away from me like it’s on fire. What the hell? That’s the only thing I get after two freaking years? My phone starts ringing. I jump off my bed, heart thumping. I give out a relieved sigh when I see who is calling or is it disappointment?

  “Hey, Michael.” I answer.